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Sunday, December 19, 2004

no referendum

Martin says no to same-sex marriage referendum CTV.ca News Staff
With Luminous Commentary every now and then... when the fancy hits me, really...! *LOL*

Prime Minister Paul Martin gave a frosty (how seasonal of him - although I would've thought of him as more of a Rudolph type... with Dubya as Satan... I mean, Santa... of course... ;) reception last Sunday to holding a national referendum on same-sex marriage, saying the issue belongs in the House of Commons.

"I think that this is an issue that Parliamentarians ought to decide," Martin said before addressing a brunch in his Montreal-area riding.
(Figures he'd be riding Montreal... and riling everybody else really...!!!).

"The courts have now given their direction. (Sure... the precipice is THAT way...! With direction(s) like that, you can't miss, Paulie my man...!) I think it's one for Parliament and I think that Parliament ought to accept their responsibility." and the blame that comes with it... eh?

And Martin wasn't alone in giving the referendum concept the cold shoulder.
Historically - hell, NO! Most Quebecker politicians have no use and see no point in asking or even knowing -much less acknowledging- "what the people want"... then again, judging from the past two American elections -and we all know that Canadians are American Imitators- "the people don't know WHAT the hell they want... and always make the WRONGEST choice in the end... hence Paulie is STILL where he was at... and so remained Dubya!

John Reynolds, the federal Conservative House Leader said his party won't push for a national referendum either, despite what Alberta Premier Ralph Klein says.

"That's Ralph," John Reynolds told CTV's Question Period on Sunday, "and Ralph is Ralph." No amounts of cream pies in the face will ever make Klein change... nope! Good ol' Ralph...

Klein told CTV's Calgary affiliate CFCN Friday he's "thoroughly disappointed" the Supreme Court gave Ottawa the go-ahead last week to redefine marriage and urged people to lobby for a national referendum. Not gonna happen

On Sunday in Montreal, Martin said the political action he's interested in will happen on the floor of the House of Commons. Sounds dirty to me...

Martin's sentiments were echoed over the weekend by his Justice Minister, Irwin Cotler, who slammed the idea of a plebiscite. That is something he learned from his namesake, Irwin R. Schyster, aka I.R.S. - who used to slam tax cheats across the land and bodyslam fakes and frauds like... well, like him and any politician now that I think about it...! *LOL* And... FHomers? No - a plebiscite is NOT a website... nor is it any form of killing; that would have to end with "-cide"!

"He's trying to do an end run around the Charter of Rights and Freedoms," Cotler said of Klein's position. "And it's not going to work." Kudos to Klein for trying... eh? As I said, good ol' Ralph...!

Harper against idea, too. Yeah... He think it bad, bad idea... no good... no... Sheesh, CTV guys - the syntax patrol must have been fast asleep last week... eh?

Conservative Leader Stephen Harper hasn't demanded a referendum but still accused the Martin Liberals of being undemocratic. Thus, next month's pay-per-view will feature a free-for-all elimination match inside a steel cage - the Martin Liberals versus the Harper... Viscerals? *LOL*

"It's clear to me that with or without a referendum, this government didn't want a democratic decision. This government wanted the court to settle the issue for it and the court refused to do so," he told reporters. So what now? We flip a coin? Let it be an impartial coin... not a gay coin now...! *LOL*

However, Harper remains opposed to same-sex marriage and said the issue now is whether Martin will allow a free vote when the bill is introduced. Sure... Free love worked for its time... now a free vote should settle THIS type of debate easy... ahhhhh - the irony!!! To think that one freebie led to the other too...! (Get it?)

"I think the total change of the definition of marriage is not what Canadians want and so I think Mr. Martin's on the wrong side of that." Truth is, Canadians and North Americans in general, for the most part anyway, are so damn confused nowadays that they have no idea anymore what the definition of marriage is anymore... Correct, folks? Uh? UH? Ok, never mind that...

NDP Member of Parliament, Bill Siksay, told Question Period his party does not support the idea of a national plebiscite on the issue. So what...?!? Nobody cares what the NDP supports or not... they are like unto a whole party full of political entities that could be likened to Canadian equivalents of the other Ralph - Nader! (Gosh - a whole party of Naders!). Who listens to him... hmm?

"I don't think you put basic human rights to a national referendum. I think this is a place where parliamentarians have to take our responsibility seriously." The next logical step: Quebec an independent country by 2006 - and Canada a dictature by 2009! *LOL*

But doing just that may stir up political controversy, warns Ontario Liberal MP Pat O'Brien, who says the vote in the House could be very tight. No - Pat is no relation to Conan O'Brien... But maybe to that bodacious CNN hostess with the mostest - might be the reason why CNN ignores Canada so much... eh?

"It's an uphill fight, but closer than some people would like to believe it is," O'Brien told CTV from his home riding in London, Ont. Yes - Pat was riding his house - sitting atop his cathedral roofing and going "hi-ho silver...!". Crazy politicians... Next month's quirky pat-per-view moments will include Pat chasing frozen stiff windmills... And in his spare time, he hosts Access Hollywood...

After the Supreme Court decision was announced, Martin said legislation extending marriage to same-sex couples will be introduced. With Paul playing the trumpet, George the base... and Ringo might be back to play drums...?

The bill will go what's known as a "two-line whip" vote in the House of Commons. That means cabinet ministers will have to vote for the bill. However, backbench MPs will be free to vote as they choose. A two-line whip... eh? A modern-day two-edged sword...?!?

O'Brien said Martin should let all of his MPs -- including cabinet ministers -- vote as they wish. 'Once in a lifetime' And Santa will also be bringing Sheila Copps her own seat, spot, PARTY - why not?

"Let them vote their conscience," O'Brien said. "This is a once-in-a-lifetime, once-in-a-career issue." To fully get in the spirit of the proceedings, the MPs might be encouraged to contemplate who would be their same-sex spouse one day... As they say, walk the walk when you talk the talk...

And, while O'Brien would not name names, he suggested one cabinet minister will vote against the bill. Somebody who has balls... indubitably! Whoever it is.

"I know one friend in cabinet who has said, 'I'm gone if I have to tow the party line on this.'" Tow? Simply start singing "Row Row Row The Boat" and ye shall see the rest of the party follow like ducklings...

Northern Development Minister Joe Comuzzi signaled Thursday he might break ranks. He said he can't break an election promise he made to constituents to fight same-sex marriage. A mid-card match-up on next month's pay-per-view; Comuzzi versus the Cause... without much of a cause, really...!

Taking a closer look at support for the legislation, it appears the 54 Bloc and 19 NDP MPs would vote for it. Of course - once a Blockhead, always a blockhead... eh?

There are 134 Liberal MPs. If 39 Liberal cabinet ministers vote for the legislation, that means as many as 87 Liberal MPs could vote in favour of the legislation while 47 could vote against it and it would still pass. Don't you just love numbers... eh?

Of the 99 Conservative MPs only one, Belinda Stronach, has said she will vote in favour of the same-sex legislation. She is looking forward to catching her first bouquet at her first big-time lesbian wedding...

That leaves 98 MPs who could vote against the bill. Uh... okay...

It's not certain how the two independents, former Liberal MP Carolyn Parrish and Chuck Cadman will vote. Is there any doubt - against anything Paulie is for! Politicians are a vindicative lot...

With a total of 308 seats in the House, the bill would need 155 votes to pass. With all that, Canadians can never again make fun of the American "electoral votes"

Meanwhile, veteran hockey star Brett Hull put the whole controversy in perspective this way on NBC's Saturday Night Live: "Well, that's what happens in Canada when there's no hockey." I actually have, personally, a whole lot more things to blame on the damn NHL, the NHLPA, the lockout and Gary Bettman - curse them all to hell!
With files from CTV's Question Period and from The Canadian Press


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