Forget About That Corny Corner-Ribbon's Drivel! The Real Secret is HERE Indeed - not over there!

Saturday, March 19, 2005

a quick round-up of topics today...

Quote of the Day

Remember that if the opportunities for great deeds should never come, the opportunities for good deeds are renewed day by day. The thing for us to long for is the goodness, not the glory.
- F.W. Faber


TODAY... indeed is St-Joseph's Day - the patron saint of workers! Can the jobless still partake of the festivities...? (Yes, I know - you are asking ''what festivities?'' - to which I answer... ''don't ask me!'' *lol*).


Loud-mouth (but always with a good reason to be so) Red Sox ace Curt Schilling will NOT be pitching on opening day for the WORLD CHAMPION BOSTON RED SOX against the execrable, justifiably hated and all-around DAMN New York YANKEES... Oh well... who cares? The Red Sox won... and Schilling pitched AND won against the Yanks when it really mattered...! Schilling's famous bloody sock is going to the Hall of Fame too... Too bad that the Red Sox nearly had to become what the Yankees are to finally beat them and everybody else... NOT a storybook ending there - nor a pleasant morale really... To become like thy enemy...? Naaaaah - the Red Sox Nation is still much more like the REBELLION FORCES than the EVIL EMPIRE... ;)


Spring is inching ever closer - baseball talk is evidence of that - conclusive enough for me anyway! Alas, it still doesn't look like it where I have the good fortune to reside, so... the dreading of another snowstorm will continue throughout March I am afraid...


The good Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice saw firsthand today what a war with North Korea might look like. From inside a mountainside bunker, Rice became the most senior American official to tour a command center for U.S. and South Korean troops that would be the battle headquarters in the event of fighting with the communist North. (...)

Welcome to the eve of destruction folks - and right on time for easter too!

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Friday, March 18, 2005

the not-so funny life of the funnyman...

Continuing the series on clowning around: why bother? (lol) Just kidding...
It is well-known that many clowns cry on the inside...
John Candy, John Belushi, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman, Sam Kinison, Andy Kaufman... the list goes on. Careers cut short... and no fairy tale endings at all.
Cracking jokes is not only a way to make a living - it appears to be also quite the effective way to keep sane... as to forget one's troubles, for a short while...

This extends to talk-show hosts too.
Even gap-toothed geeks like one David Letterman.
Gee - the man's personal life is not exactly rosey... makes one wonder what plagues chin-challenged Jay Leno... or happily hairy Jon Stewart... or freckled freak Conan O'Brien... or... who was that guy who hosted the Late Late Show again... Craig who?!? But I digress... (especially since all of these guys are alive and doing VERY WELL financially... The first group of clown acts is six feet under - and all left way too early. There is even a bit f an urban legend linking the deaths of Candy, Belushi, Farley and Kinison to a role they were all offered - a major jinx of a role apparently... Some wiseguy once said "why not offer it (the role) to Andrew Dice Clay" - I would also offer it to Steve Martin - but that is just me; I have no love lost for smug would-be bilking dirty rotten scoundrel-like JERKS... who push it so far as to usurp the roles defended by real thespians like Spencer Tracy! I'm digressing again, aren't I?).

Anyway - good old Dave of Worldwide Pants fame has a lot to deal with off-stage oftentimes it seems... Next time he delivers his deadpan jokes in an acerbic tone, you will cut him some slack once you read the things he deals with - in the comments section. Read all the way through - the topper is the very last "fact" concerning "Mrs. David Letterman"...

Thursday, March 17, 2005

clowning around isn't always well-advised...

Heck - simply making jokes to bring some levity into one's monotonous existence and lighten the atmosphere around is sometimes badly perceived... so... the following story should come as no shock at all really... (and let no jokester say "hey - didn't you say those articles on which you base your blogs about were going to show up in the comments section - like, exclusively from now on... huh?" Because this is TLB Prime; my blog, my prerogative! I reserve the right to quote from articles within the blog itself whenever I want; if it helps, if I feel like it... Fair Use Act! And, besides, this is a fairly short press release anyway - nothing much more than THAT! And so...)

VANCOUVER (CP) - A Vancouver woman has filed a lawsuit against Cirque du Soleil alleging one of its clown's acts went terribly wrong.
Maria Miller had a stage-side seat at the July 2003 performance of Alegria Cirque du Soleil. Her lawyer, Val LeBlanc, said a clown tumbled across the stage towards the audience and was meant to stop. "It was supposed to thrill the audience, but a tether either broke or wasn't attached properly," he said Tuesday.
The lawsuit claims the burly performer tumbled into Miller, causing her numerous soft-tissue injuries.
She alleges negligence on the part of two performers and the circus.
Miller is suing for her personal injuries, income loss and expenses because of the incident.
The circus hasn't filed a statement of defence.

Let that be a lesson to a great many people today:
1) to the jokesters dressed up as leprechauns on this St-Paddy's Day...
2) to le Cirque Du Soleil - for hiring just any tumbler off the street...
3) to Maria Miller for seeking alegria (...) at the wrong place/wrong time... but hey, it is still much better than some of us seeking love in the wrong places/wrong times with the wrong choices for mates as well...
4) to funnymen like Jay Leno who will likely not resist making a funny about this one... (so, okay - I am sort of guilty too...) :(
5) to all the legal eagles who have profited from these type of cases - oh, damn... they will always have such cases to make names for themselves with... okay... carry on...

No Nostradamus this week -or ever again- as I am still not 100% here... I need St Uhro, St Patrick and St Joseph (celebrated on nearly... consecutive days as it is - March the 16th, the 17th and the 19th respectively) and then an extra dozen saints to help me it seems... *LOL*
And, in parting, this appropriate greeting...
Count your blessings instead of your crosses;
Count your gains instead of your losses.
Count your joys instead of your woes;
Count your friends instead of your foes.
Count your smiles instead of your tears;
Count your courage instead of your fears.
Count your full years instead of your lean;
Count your kind deeds instead of your mean.
Count your health instead of your wealth;
Love your neighbor as much as yourself


Wednesday, March 16, 2005

québécois pure laine... ouais...

If you have not a single bone in you that hails from north of the border (you know which border it is, I gather...) - you will not decipher the title of today's entry of the luminous blog...
Well... too bad! And - you're better off as well!
Don't get me wrong now... Most times, I relish the fact that the fates (the Lord, really) or mere kismet has found it fitting to place me in a spot on this earth where I would be exposed to many cultures - without being hard-pressed to embrace any one of them completely! This has in fact contributed in large part in making me a citizen of the world - with an unbiased point of view and thus, the right to speak out...
Likely, a divine right too - for I believe it is all (as everything else) The Good Lord's Plan... but I digress!
So, here, where I sit, I have been witness to cultural bombardment from Anglo-Saxons, French-Canadians, Well-Read Americans, Redneck Americans, the French, the English, English Canada, Italians, Latinos, Portuguese, Greeks... even Bollywood!
It just can't get more melting pot-like or cultural mosaic-like than that (so what if the mosaic is unraveling at the seams... or if the pot is about to burst!).
Really - if it sounds like I am complaining - I am not... yet!
People like Rosie O'Donnell have gone public lamenting that they have so much "useless (so-called) cultural (TV crap really) knowledge stuck in (their) head".
Whoopee-do. At least you duds have had only one set of it...
Me, I find with chagrin that I STILL remember that old French-Canadian SITCOM or annoying jingle from a commercial no American ever saw... I also still remember old Brazilian, British and CBC shows none of you ever heard of... but hey, THAT I don't resent half as much... today anyway! *lol*
It can't get much worse than having parts of your own personal memory banks still replaying silly routines from Symphorien (no - don't ask) or repeating the so-so stand-up comedy lines of the likes of RBO, Pierre Verville and Yvon Deschamps... Worse yet, the lyrics of Robert Charlebois or Dan Bigras... Oh my God - and you crazy Americans thought you had it bad with Meat Loaf, Denis O'Leary and Chris Rock...

Still... for all the bad, there is always one good element to be found - in there, somewhere... One has to look hard for it sometimes, go back in time -as far back as 1987 at least- to unearth a little gem underestimated by the world at large... and even a good chunk of his very own local industry... check it out... in the comments section (and feel free to add to it - if you know of other such little gems from "la Belle Province"... Those who speak not French, feel free to ask for a translation... or use that seldom used "translate" toolbar device...!).

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

''why here'' - the dumbest thing to ask...

The dumbest, probably bar none... Why is it that people forget what deep down they know...? Fear makes one negate a lot of things - including precaution... Rationalizing that ''nah - it could never happen here'' and ''nah - this will never happen to US...'' leads to nasty surprises sometimes...

Why should the other continents hold the monopoly on fanatical extremists, disturbed timebombs, utter evil in our midst...?!? Some people do sleep better at night (some during the day though - but that is another story!) thinking that there is nothing rotten within a reasonable radius around their sanctorum... They are only fooling themselves... and, deep down, they know it too. But it is better to live ignorantly... it is better not to know... All we can really do is merely 'pretend ' not to know though... Not to know what lurks, quite possibly, in our very own neighborhood - practically in our backyard, heck, in our very homes sometimes...

Some folks in Ottawa, Ont. and Brookfield, Wis. got the shock of their lives recently - and it was a surprise to them because they likely chose to be blind to the signs. It is always like that - they will be suspicious of the imagined threat, see one when it isn't there at all in truth, but they will not see it where it hides in broad daylight - barely "hiding" really... Such is that thing called human nature - a very flawed machine there...

Monday, March 14, 2005

all jets are not go...

I guess it is too easy to add just a few extra words to any given song to spoof it... likewise, it is too easy to use songs to do a take-off (no pun intended... or is it) on a current headline...
Like... ''I'm NOT leaving... in a jetsgo plane''
Or... ''I wanna fly like an eagle... to the sea... fly like an eagle... because jetsgo won't fly me...'' *LOL*
Sending it up more abruptly, with something like this - ''Take... these BROKEN WINGS... and let them fly again (yeah right - fat chance now...)'' - might be a no-no...
What is so sad though, is that the end of jetsgo sounds the end of really, and I do mean REALLY affordable jet-flying... Not that any jetsgo frequent flyer could lay claim to the ''title'' of one Nature Boy (''jet-flying, limousine-riding, kiss-stealing, wheeling-dealing sonuvagun'') - but then, who wants to be that in these far more dangerous (and less innocent) times... hmm?

Bye bye jetsgo - we hardly knew (exploited) thee...

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