Forget About That Corny Corner-Ribbon's Drivel! The Real Secret is HERE Indeed - not over there!

Saturday, February 24, 2007


Now maybe THIS will successfully hypnotize ya!

Chicks dig new agey stuff - or so they say!
Note: I am NOT new agey - I am aging old-style;
the good old fashioned way! ;)


Friday, February 23, 2007

Luminous Friday Night Music Time Again - Plus: A Bonus - Magic Time Too!

Gee - Is it really time to replace the music on TLB Prime already? Time flies... when you freeze?!? It seemed to be going pretty slowly today, oddly enough, as I was freezing my derrière and flirting with frostbite... Said entity did bite me in the rear end too, but that is another sad story I shall spare you all at this time!
So then - some more music - a magic act - and we all go to bed happy; right?
One can hope for so much - however, in this day and age of profound discontent, where jobs and lives are lost routinely; there is strife everywhere; and not a glimmer of hope to be found (aside from the Almighty, really) - how can I seriously expect to make any kind of difference here with my trivial entertainment?!?
Oh well - seek solace, L.O.V.s and other strangers, in the comforting realization that, HERE -on TLB Prime- you got it all FOR FREE!
Not counting your ISP charges - of course! ;)
Onwards with the music & the magic then...!

And now, our magic trick...

So now then - you do my bidding!
Or... I do yours?
No - that's not right! I won't... ever...
Yes, Master. :!


Thursday, February 22, 2007

I was violated - again _____ :(

Another movie made about me - stashed away for me not to see -
for it was made without my consent - and its makers will simply not repent?!?

I wonder if the plot is as contrived as my destiny appears to be -
with many ill-advised rewrites by unauthorized personnel, as it is...
I wonder if it is, overall, as complicated a tale
as my passage on Earth has proven to be
so far...


Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Saints & Angels: The TLB Prime Series

Can we become angels when we die?
I have to answer emphatically - no!
We can aspire to saintliness though - and, paradoxically enough, Jesus taught us that we can even aspire to PERFECTION - did He not tell us to be as perfect as our Celestial Father Is? Did He not inspire us to forgive, forget, turn the other cheek and even allow the bad guys to have a semblance of victory over us?
Did He not certify that the Kingdom of God belongs to the persecuted, the meek, the afflicted and the lame?
What - you wanted to be the "king of the world" down here, and then get the rolled carpet treatment once you ascended? (You may get all that, mind you - but that would be after you've descended...! They have carpets down there too - and red is their favorite color! But that is another story - after all, this is "Saints & Angels on The Luminous Blog" and not "Sinners & Demons on The Ludicrous Blog" - right? So, let's move on...!)

There was no greater man than John The Baptist - but he was of lesser importance than the most infinitesimal soul in Heaven! That means ANGELS folks!
Angeldom cannot be bestowed upon you, unlike what the likes of Clarence of "It's A Wonderful Life" fame might have you believe! It is not a promotion that one can hope to get - even though a wordsmith like me succumbs to the inherent and indelible charm of the expression "to earn one's wings" - they CANNOT BE EARNED. They cannot be BOUGHT either - and they cannot even be INHERITED, much less legated...
God created one batch of his favored creatures - and some went rotten!
God created man - and so many of them went bad it isn't even funny anymore!
God created the lesser creatures of all - and He Is not disappointed with those - at all! Animals have never fallen so far from The Plan and so down in the gutter as man and that original bad bunch of fallen angels did... No wonder they still hold up high in God's Esteem!

No to say that there aren't saints among the human race today; for every 100 soulless sinners, there's 10 viable candidates for sainthood today!
Likewise, for every 100 fallen angels, there remained in the Kingdom of God 1000s upon 1000s of faithful angels!
(Hmm... this is sounding like an edition of Statistics Sundays - but we're not Sunday today, are we?)
How do I know all that, you ask?
Is it all fairytale material, asks the Drogo fan club president...
No - it isn't.
The ratio of soulless vs.saints is easy enough to verify, I do believe...
As for the angels and demons - ask your ever-popular Mr. Brown!

And the surefire bets for immediate admission (back) into Heaven/Paradise?
That's right - Mr. Felix, Puppy Love and Monsieur Snuggles!
Heck - even a crocodile has more chances than some individuals in suit and tie out there...! I could tell you - but I won't! ;)

No snakes though - under ANY circumstances!
Thank you!



Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Back off, "Heroes" - I'll be summoning LUMINOUS HEROES now! ;)

I am just about sick and tired of this new trend of the "rag-tag group of neophytical so-called heroes that are learning to use their powers for the greater good"...!!!
Rag-tag hero groups weren't popular in previous decades (JLA Detroit!) when it REALLY DESERVED TO BE... Why has this trend picked up so much NOW?!?
It is truly quite pathetic to see that this entire trend originated with the Disney release of The Incredibles (which stole from DC the name "Elasti-Girl" just like Marvel Comics Group a.k.a. Marvel Entertainment a.k.a. Marvel Properties a.k.a. Marvel Characters -depending if they are financially stable or on the verge of bankruptcy again- stole the name "Captain Marvel" from DC too... I wonder how it is that no one has stolen the name "Congorilla" from DC yet...? But I digress... *lol*)
And now, we see all over the place, et à toutes les sauces... (in other words, in all flavors too!)
From NBC's Heroes to the ordinarily cheap SRC's Invincibles - the trend seems to know no boundaries of logic, restraint or decency!

You want heroes so bad, people? You want FLAWED heroes that EVERYONE can readily identify with, HUH? I'll give you heroes... right here, RIGHT NOW!

First, let's hear it for OSTRICH MAN
(Better than a BATTY MAN any day o'the week! Eat your hearts out, DC!)


And then, make way for... GARBAGE MAN!

Let's upgrade the image of this team right now with... MAN RAY!

And let's bring BACK the REAL IRON MAN while we're at it!
(No - I don't fear you, Johnny Marvel! Or Stan The Man and Joe Q! ;)

Now we really need a SOUL MAN here

And why not a HURDY GURDY MAN with that - eh?

Some wisdom required on this team - summon forth OLD MAN

Guess we could also use a MAN WITHOUT FEAR here...

I'd rather team up with SOLITARY MAN though...

By the same token, his sidekick, LONELY MAN, is a shoo-in too!

In the same vein, we can let in the SON OF A PREACHER MAN
(Hey - the damnable Defenders let in the sicko Son of Satan into their less-than-venerable ranks!)

Oh yeah - we need RAMBLIN MAN on our side!

A hard-as-nails WORKING MAN can be of service too...

One cannot go wrong with BETTER MAN (can we...?!?)

I'd let in the "MISTERY MAN" - but he has to learn how to spell (not to mention smell) a MYSTERY... y'know?!?
(Even the loser Mystery Men knew at least how to do just that!)

Some down-to-earth earnestness now with... SIMPLE MAN!

I doubt he's available - for he is with The Specials - but maybe we can add some levity here by adjoining ourselves the MONKEY MAN...?
(He'd be our Least - I mean, Beast! ;)

Why not give a chance to HOOCHIE COOCHIE MAN while we're at it...?
(A chance... at redemption!!!)

And, just to cater for the troops, PIZZA MAN...

The debate is on whether or not to admit INTOXICATED MAN in our midst...

I guess his name would help our cause, merchandizing-wise... WANTED MAN?!?

Finally, for our foils - the BLUE MAN GROUP!

And my personal arch-nemesis - BURGER MAN! *lol*

I tried to find a "GOOD MAN" to be a part of this team - it just didn't work!
Good guys finish last and have little drawing power anyway - RIGHT?


Monday, February 19, 2007

Monday Night FIGHT!

Oh, it's just me having an umpteenth craving for a$$-whupping action -
anybody out there wants to volunteer their sorry a$$?
You have to be this tall, male, moronic, obnoxious to the point of near-evildom, detestable, execrable, smug, a thug, a bit of a bully too, vainglorious, full-of-yourself, uncaring, apathetic, ungodly, idiotic, hateful, a mocking bastard of an s.o.b. and have all your teeth
(Don't deprive me the pleasure of knocking them all out now!)
Any applicants can apply via Luminous Country - yeah, you do know exactly where to find me! So... Let's get it on! ;)
Join The Luminous Fight Club!
And let's get ready to rrrrreally rrrrrrumble!!!

And I pity the fool who will want to defend your sorry hide!


Sunday, February 18, 2007

More Illogical Idiocy...

So then, if all is well and "in capable hands" out there - how in blue blazes do you explain this:

- Suburban towns finally inaugurating the subway for their decent citizens - just because of their proximity to the proverbial "big town" and in order, hence, to fit in with its polluted and depleted environment more... And what do these geniuses wind up inaugurating? Three stations adeed that end up giving customers metro stations within WALKING DISTANCE OF EACH OTHER -that's of great help, eh- which evidently represents no change at all for either the furthest denizens residing in the heart of the not-so fair city or those actually living around these stations... Further more, wild speculation (isn't it always - wild?) amongst realtors and home owners has everyone daydreaming about selling their houses eventually for up to TWICE as much as it is really worth - just because it rests now upon soil that belongs to a town with a SUBWAY SYSTEM!
That fact alone should make the value of your piece of crappy real estate raise in value - really? Howcome? How could it affect the value of a home that is too far removed from any semblance of a metro station? WHY should it increase its value? Where's the logic in that? WHO said that it is logical?!? (Wow - going systematically through the whole damn "W5" routine here - eh?)
And, of course, the opposite could be true for those homes that are EXTREMELY CLOSE TO THE METRO STATIONS... Like, right above the tracks? Hasn't such lengthy and extraneous excavating actually done you more harm, potentially, than good? What if the ground was not MADE to house such long tunnels in it? What if the engineers were WRONG? These are CANADIAN engineers after all - not the brightest bulbs in the pack, you know! If the Big Dig geniuses up in Boston could make a mistake or two - a poor evaluation or three - what about those at the helm of the extension of the Montreal metro, huh? It won't raise your home's value at all if the very foundations of it start crumbling down beneath your feet, you know! Mere specualation, I know, but it befits the highly-speculative market, so...! ;)
Enjoy that sinking feeling, realtors and real estate investors...! :)

- Something I forgot to mention the last time I did this, about specifically the celebrated and invertebrated MySpace.Com... myspace is so very obtuse - according to their inane rules, we cannot comment on our own accounts because we are not "friends" with ourselves...?!? That makes no damn sense! Even Care2 allows us to message OURSELVES (quite nonsensically too)...!!! Much less comment on OUR OWN STUFF...!
Get a brain, MySpace!

- Credit cards... Over 30% of those who own more than a few of those pesky things have no idea what their rate is! Not talking about their credit rate - but really about the reimbursement rate! Creditors though are the dumbest of them all - it is either that or they are the crookiest of them all! They look at someone with really bad credit history - like, 7 cards past their limit already - and they will give him another card! They like not being paid or something...? No - they like kicking someone when he's down! Better yet - they're vultures! I don't know about you, but I'd take a loan shark over a vulture any day of the week - but never on Sunday! ;)
The pits is to hear credit champions proclaim high and mighty that all is fine, using old adages such as "trust the market - the market will take care of it all for you" when they are told NOT TO DO THAT ANYMORE... The market is CRAP; let's establish that right now! Nothing good ever came from listening to what the masses want or merely THINK that they want/need/crave... Going by what the market dictates is the wrongest choice of all - morally wrong and not viable in any way, in the long run, because the trends come and go and never stay the same in the public's volatile flights of fancy and collective mindset!!!

- Astrology... I am not a fan, but to hear a nitwit like third party-leader Mario Dumont state that "if the people of Quebec entrust us with the power to lead them, I can assure them that we shall certainly not lead them through the use of astrological pseudo-knowledge..."
Oh yeah, Mario? Really? Do you realize that a truly great leader of an ACTUAL COUNTRY (as opposed to Quebec, the wannabee country and lousy mere province) and a PRESIDENT (not a mere "Prime Minister" as you aspire to be - and never will be) of a nation 10 times as populated as yours ACTUALLY DID USE ASTROLOGY before making important decisions...?
I am talking about Ronald Reagan, of course. A President ten times superior to that pathetic Dubya - but that is another story...
It was good enough for Ronald - but not good enough for you, Mario?
Contrary to popular belief, it is Marios who are clowns - not Ronalds! (All the more reason to never heed the market's tendencies - popular belief is always off the mark!)
Mario Dumont is, on top of that, a wannabee antichrist-like harbinger of a new order... It makes for quite the incongruous final product, I'd say...! He did bring up one good "anti-astrology" point though: daily horoscopes give winning lottery numbers to each sign. Those are 12 different "winning" combinations - when there are only a few lotteries per territory that those can apply to, never more than 3 to 5? That makes sense... NOT, indeed. Mario still loses due to his overbearing obnoxious pride! He ain't got my vote - even if I could/would vote there! ;)
Astrology though has nothing to do with daily horoscopes - the latter is pure "garbage entertainment" and nothing else. True astrology is much more complex - it is also much more personal than a generalized/trivialized daily horrorscope...! Nostradamus was for real - so I cannot discard astrology all-together, with the back of the hand, as a vulgar politician will do...


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© 2007 Onwards ~ Luminous Luciano Pimentel
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