Forget About That Corny Corner-Ribbon's Drivel! The Real Secret is HERE Indeed - not over there!

Saturday, January 20, 2007

saturday stupidity (obtuseness didn't seem to fit quite as well there - sorry!)

But all right, I will concede - if not stupidity, let's speak of dementia then?
Dementia and all that it entails - what may come before or after it, that is...
Everyone is prone to these things, you know; dementia, lunacy, paranoia, apophenia, indifference, aphasia, absent-mindedness, gullibility, apathy, self-centeredness, arrogance, cruelty, ignorance, hypocrisy, apoplexy, apostasy...

Now, every single one of us can have bouts with any one of these unsightly aspects of our egos at almost any given time during the course of our lives, really... And those who do not admit to have succumbed at least a few times are adding another baddie to the list; lying! But that is another story and affliction - denial! Let's stick to dementia today...

On many occasions, it isn't the fault of the afflicted one at all - it just came upon him one fateful day, like a ton of bricks. There was nothing to do but to cope with it and learn to live with it. When one is stricken with a condition, benign or otherwise, one always finds a way to roll with it. If it doesn't kill you, it only makes you stronger - right? Verily, it is not how you deal with it that is the worst part - it is how others do that is the true problem! Others will exploit it against you, give you a hard time or simply belittle you... We've all seen that transpire - admit it, folks!

And so, crazy demented people -as well any degree of lameness there is- are frowned upon, demeaned and outright abused. My luminous suggestion to you all is simple: jog your grey matter muscles and fight back in a brainy way - heck, dare I say a luminous way! You can't speak properly? Gesticulate your annoyance! A finger speaks louder than a thousand words - they say it about an image at any rate! This is merely step one though - the preliminary phase of a master plan of self-affirmation and retaliation! After the finger has been dutifully pointed in the right direction (...) go about handing out meticulously pre-prepared photoshopped pictures of thy aggressors showing them in very compromising positions... These are obviously fakes but they'll ridicule thy enemy, thus accomplishing their primary purpose and exacting satisfactory revenge! If your adversary swindled money out of your naive personality's purse, you may indeed prolong the exercise! Maybe even blackmail a little bit - you might recuperate some of the moolah that way! It is a big "maybe" though... Each case is unique and should call for its own personalized handling.

Crazy old people now - those are the perfect targets for scams of all sorts, online as "offline"... It is up to the estate to exact swift revenge in these particular cases! I know I would... Alas, I cannot indulge in my own luminous methods - for, you see, my dear saintly dad was not stricken with dementia in the sense of senility, at all. He was, throughout his life, wise with his goods and wary of any and all crooks. If he was still astoundingly unlucky, it was simply because fate/kismet/destiny was such a damned bitch! Belief in fate does not go hand-in-hand with Faith - at all! Such is my luminous statement today - for fate, like "mother nature", is but an usurping entity that dares attempt to take the spot that belongs to only One - the Creator, God! God allowed this entity to be as bitchy as she undoubtedly is, just like He allows the devil to be his usual loathsome self - hence, you see it coming, I am racking in the devil, mother nature and fate all together in the same pile of $hit! Aye, tough call - but I am here to make it! ;)

One thing that clearly helped my dear dad to offset senility/dementia for his entire life, was the mere fact that he was bilingual! Me, I am trilingual - and some speak up to nine or ten languages, fluently! Those who do speak 2 or more are at an advantage over, say, the numbskull Québécois who sticks to his pathetic mangled version of French (par exemple...!) - for it helps greatly in overall brain efficiency. Nerve connections are healthier as a result of the boosted blood supply to the brain - such an increased blood flow is reputed to help fight off senility, the onset of Alzheimer's Disease (which is incurable - via traditional "certifiable" medecine anyhow...) and so on... So, it isn't me saying it - it's the damn quack establishment! You will surely take it into account now, discard the witticisms herein, disregard the tongue-in-cheek tone of the present piece and go out there and learn another language - or ten!
It's the right thing to do! :)
Oops - that's copyrighted to that oatmeal commercial - is it not?
Then I'll simply say that "it's the luminous thing to do"...! There! ;)

Now, québécois and québécoises who might be reading this -quacks or not- do not run, all at once, to your cells or portables to dial "254-6011 - deux cinq quatre six zéro un un - two five four six "o" one one"...!
I may be L.P. but I do not endorse LPS - at all! ;)

It would be, verily, almost as pathetic as giving in to a 40,000$ Nigerian e-mail scam... Or that other African scam that is "out there"... Those who fall for these type of things already know two languages, usually - they are, alas it would seem, beyond help as it is already... :(


Friday, January 19, 2007

* ~Delight~ *




Thursday, January 18, 2007

~ Light ~

Click on the Luminous Light Bulb to see just how much it truly is the brightest bulb in the pack! ;)


Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Scorpions On The Plane!

Alright - admittedly, there was only one. Whereas they had more than one snake on that jet Samuel L. Jackson was flying in...

My questioning is - where is airport beefed-up security in all this?
They have shoe scans now - they confiscate all manners of aerosols and blades - they take no chances and go overboard on precautionary measures so that "another 9/11" doesn't happen (if it is meant to happen again though - it will. No amounts of precautionary measures can offset predestined things...)
And yet - scorpions and snakes can get on the damn planes?
Granted, the second species only went nuts in a bit of fiction fluff...
Pets are allowed on planes though - the only problem is that some individuals' idea of what a "pet" can be is downright too exotic for any sane person's tastes!
A tarantula? A scorpion?!? A damn revolting snake - which you feed mice and bunnies to?!? Ditch the damn serpent and adopt the defenseless bunny instead, you dumb morons! Get a gerbil, a hamster, a mouse - not to feed it to a monster that hisses in contentment but to be YOUR PET!
Anybody who is a "snake lover" is, to me, someone with a brain chemical imbalance of some sort... One cannot pet and love the embodiment of evil in the animal kingdom - no way! Just the process of feeding these slithering monsters is abominable in itself - if you love it so damn much, why don't you feed yourself to the darn snake, huh? (Some silly snake lover found out just how demented he was in thinking that the snake loved him back or something, too - the snake went ballistic! It swallowed up "non-food items" - bit its master - killed the neighbor's dog or cat, I forget now...

All this to say that, if I ever encounter a snake owner - expect me to do the right thing and BEHEAD THE DAMN CREATURE BEFORE HIS FEEDING TIME COMES!

As for the scorpions and other strange pets making it onto airplanes...
Maybe that is the next Al Qaïda weapon right there, hmm?
I can see it now: "we are taking over this plane now - or the stewardess gets a scorpion sting right between the eyes!"
I'd prefer to see a male steward being threatened in such a savage way though, if it's all the same to you...!


Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Blame It On The O's!

To judge someone, is to take a chance that you're wrong.
Well, not if we have ALL THE FACTS - duh!
In the violence resurgence in Baltimore so far - in the first nine days of 2007 only; ten murders - there can be no doubt on who the culprits are (the usual suspects, once more, up to no good, causing mischief and mayhem in the neighborhood! Wow - Will Smith would be proud of the rhyme...!)
and we can safely say also that these types deserve to have the book thrown at them...
Now, others, I'd throw the entire bookcase at, without hesitation, care or the slightest pang of guilt either!
But that is another sordid story...
Best served, methinks, by the lugubrious or ludicrous or lunacy blogs - those blogs that are part of the TLB PRIME NETWORK and are tailor-made to unceremoniously explore, bash and expose the lowest lifeforms around the globe...! ;)
The luminous blog must remain above that scum!

As for Baltimore - they can be seen on pace already for topping their 2006 totals of 275 murders...
The O's - a not-so-subtle inference at another sub-strata of society - are, of course, not really responsible for all this...
They had a miserable season in 2006 too - one that culminated with a 9-0 loss to the Boston Red Sox as I recall ;)
But I couldn't resist making the funny...
Makes for a striking, attention-grabbing title - don't you think? ;)
But hey - birds of a feather assemble - right?
Bloodthirsty O's can always try to "hang" with the temporarily world champion Cardinals this year...
Neither team will stop the Red Sox, I say! :)
But I digress again...!

All the sordid details about Baltimore's bloodfest - in the luminous comments section! :)


Monday, January 15, 2007

2007 could be the warmest year ever...

Tell that to the fine denizens of the province of Saskatchewan, Canada...
These past few days, they have been reacquainted with the concepts of "deep freeze", "killer cold" and "frostbite" like never before in their lives...
Skin exposure to this cold would lead to any and all of these things within 10 minutes!
Three women have died from exposure to this cold - two because they made the mistake of leaving their stranded car in the middle of a blizzard to venture a little farther away to get help from a garage... Another because she chose the wrongest day of all to go for a walk - she was later found frozen to death a mere 200 feet from her home.

The news coverage does not tell us how all these sasquatches -to be surely found out there- are coping with the cold, though...

Seriously now, not the slightest consideration seems to be given to the animals that might be freezing to death too, unable to cope with such sudden climactic changes themselves, despite the fur they have on themselves... Fur, feathers or whatever... Wild birds will freeze to death. I will never forget the sight of a tiny crow, frozen solid, near an overpass (no, not the one that collapsed - maybe it will be the NEXT ONE to collapse though... Who knows? Crazier things have happened "na Laval" as cousin Adriano would say... But those are other stories!)
Bird brains are excused for not having had the foresight and simple common sense to fly away when they could have... (Not that "snowbirds" as they call them here -not feathered freaks at all; but freaks nonetheless- are any smarter - cause they're not. They're just more able to move about...)
What's our excuse though? Why do we put up with such atrocious weather - ever since Jacques Cartier's mistake? Sons and descendents do pay for their fathers' sins or errors, I tell you... Canadians are paying for France's cupidity in wanting a chunk of "the New World" so damn bad - and for England's stubbornness as well!
The poor animals though -what's left of the wild life here- they have no choice in the matter and are simply there; not their fault or even their furthest sire's fault if their species came to be here...

I'll feel sympathy for the plight of a four-legged critter sooner than I'll feel empathy for a two-legged hypocrite's just desserts, I tell ya... ;)
Hell will freeze over on the day that I place any human sinner over, say, a wolfpack that doesn't know any better and simply goes on survival instinct alone... There's no malice there; the same cannot be said about the human...

Back to the "Lady Amongst Provinces" now (with apologies to Manitoba...)
Alberta has been under the brunt of the polar blasts too lately - it is where, it is odd to note, one can find the North and South ends of the Saskatchewan river as well as Fort Saskatchewan... They are not "twin provinces", as they have Manitoba stashed right in between them (they might be triplets then?)
The Saskatchewan river is the one body of water around which legendary gold is reputed to be found. But not even Lafayette French, BlackJack or any other would-be goldmine prospector of old would try to find that gold now, in such a cold time of the year... Truth is, no one has found it since BlackJack's equally cold-blooded murder - hence its legendary status! And they sure have searched for it, long often and hard, when the weather is more agreeable for such a thing - obviously!

Today, I get out of the house in the morning to be met by near-blizzard-like conditions right here as well...

And the "experts" say 2007 will be the warmest year ever...?
Like hell it will...


Sunday, January 14, 2007

statistics sundays - and more!

Beware, USA and other countries of the world that are envious of Canada's much-flaunted healthcare system... It is not half as good as you think! The evidence follows...

A study that is already two years-old found that Canadians routinely underestimate their true weight - with all the repercussions that that can have on their health and on the overall cost of healthcare each and every year, as you can well imagine...
On top of that, read this:
Unexplained symptoms afflict 5% of Canadians... Those are symptoms that baffle ALL of the esteemed medical establishment...!
17% of Canadians do not have a family doctor though (like, why bother?)
In Quebec, that figure is much worse - 28% without a family quack!
They seek one - but none
are available!
Yes; doctors actually flat out refuse to see more patients!
I always wondered... If a medical check-up is a yearly thing, and so little actual in-depth analysis is done for each individual patient, can't these quacks have in excess of 300 patients each then? I mean, there are 365 days a year - I am already being FAR TOO GENEROUS and leaving out a whupping 65 days for vacation time for these quacks! Do they really expect me to believe that EACH DOC WHO REFUSES A NEW PATIENT HAS ALREADY MET HIS QUOTA OF 300 PATIENTS APIECE?!? No freaking way... Their likely voiced reason to refuse getting even remotely close to that astronomical number of 300 will probably be "filing and file processing costs would be too much" and they'll add "but you may try the private sector"...
I know ONE quack who will not refuse ANYBODY - Dr. Pierre Marsolais, champion of the distasteful cause of organ donation - he won't refuse anybody who dies and donates all or most organs! Then, he'll take credit for each organ "sold" - and that alone can make his total "patients affected ratio" rise up to... 1000 a year?!?
Way to go, Marsolais - for most docs it is "save some, lose some" but for you it is "kill some and resurrect some - AGAINST GOD'S WISHES, PROBABLY!"
But of course, all quacks, almost, have some sort of God Complex - we aaaaall know that! Pierre doesn't go well with Frankenstein though - drats, poor you Marsolais! Twice out of luck ye art in fact, Jack, because I didn't sign my healthcare card in the back, "buddy"! Guess you won't be able to resell these parts without my pre-written authorization, eh? You better not... That is in the mere supposition that I go before you do, pal! Don't bet on it...
I'm sorry? I called you Jacques? Not Pierre?
Three strikes then - you're out of this blog! ;)

To the a$$hole who said -somewhere, somewhen- that "we are all going to die", echoing, probably, a Joe Pesci character (Jimmy "Jericho"Alto) from the last decade that he'd caught on some lazy late night on pay television... I'd like to answer, here and now, with this: of course, we are all going to die. Only a few of us have lived the life though. Better yet, only a few of us have led benevolent lives... Worthwhile lives... Saintly lives. Only a precious few of us left anymore will access The Life - Eternal Life. And you're not among that elite - pukey boy!

Now back to the regularly scheduled program...
As for the lack of family docs in Canada - help is, apparently, on the way!
And it comes from Britain!
That's right - British surplus quacks will be flocking over (about 3300 over the next three years, they estimate) simply because they cannot find work in the U.K. anymore... Doctors Who I, II, III, IV, V, VI and doctors Why (bother), When, Where, How and, mostly, What, will surely be among their overrated numbers...
Isn't this so typically
pathetic of Canada though? They are still under the control of their colonial power! Still under the power of the Crown of England! Still dependent upon it! Nothing wrong with being dependent per se - but don't pretend to be "a country" and don't act independent so darn much, then! Lest you become more like unto a... Québec? Yikes! It must be true - we are our own worst enemy!

I do wonder what that 5% is though...
Maybe the subject of another blog post right there...
Or an essay...? Short story? Novel? Movie script?
The sky's the limit!
But that's another story... ;)

I simply have to add a special video to this post though, before I leave for la-la-land - a song that says it like it is - "au gré des saisons... la vie me prend... la vie me jette... tôt ou tard... tôt ou tard..."

Fiche technique du vidéoclip:
Artiste: Dumas
Titre: Au Gré Des Saisons
Production: Nù Films
Director / Réalisateur : Louis-Philippe Eno
Client : Tacca
Design : Julien Demers-Arsenault

Technician(s)/Animator(s) / Technicien(s)/Animateur(s) :
Julien Demers-Arsenault, Olivier Laberge, Paul Laberge

Creative Director / Directeur de Création :
Olivier Laberge

Post-Production Producer(s) / Producteur(s) Post-Production :
Charles Massicotte

Techniques :
3D tracking, After effects, Object animation, 3D animation


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© 2007 Onwards ~ Luminous Luciano Pimentel
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