Forget About That Corny Corner-Ribbon's Drivel! The Real Secret is HERE Indeed - not over there!

Friday, March 18, 2005

the not-so funny life of the funnyman...

Continuing the series on clowning around: why bother? (lol) Just kidding...
It is well-known that many clowns cry on the inside...
John Candy, John Belushi, Chris Farley, Phil Hartman, Sam Kinison, Andy Kaufman... the list goes on. Careers cut short... and no fairy tale endings at all.
Cracking jokes is not only a way to make a living - it appears to be also quite the effective way to keep sane... as to forget one's troubles, for a short while...

This extends to talk-show hosts too.
Even gap-toothed geeks like one David Letterman.
Gee - the man's personal life is not exactly rosey... makes one wonder what plagues chin-challenged Jay Leno... or happily hairy Jon Stewart... or freckled freak Conan O'Brien... or... who was that guy who hosted the Late Late Show again... Craig who?!? But I digress... (especially since all of these guys are alive and doing VERY WELL financially... The first group of clown acts is six feet under - and all left way too early. There is even a bit f an urban legend linking the deaths of Candy, Belushi, Farley and Kinison to a role they were all offered - a major jinx of a role apparently... Some wiseguy once said "why not offer it (the role) to Andrew Dice Clay" - I would also offer it to Steve Martin - but that is just me; I have no love lost for smug would-be bilking dirty rotten scoundrel-like JERKS... who push it so far as to usurp the roles defended by real thespians like Spencer Tracy! I'm digressing again, aren't I?).

Anyway - good old Dave of Worldwide Pants fame has a lot to deal with off-stage oftentimes it seems... Next time he delivers his deadpan jokes in an acerbic tone, you will cut him some slack once you read the things he deals with - in the comments section. Read all the way through - the topper is the very last "fact" concerning "Mrs. David Letterman"...

Painter charged with plotting to kidnap David Letterman's son, nanny
HELENA, Mont. (AP) - A painter working at David Letterman's Montana ranch was charged Thursday with plotting to kidnap the talk-show host's toddler son and nanny and hold them for $5 million ransom.

Kelly Frank, 43, was being held on a felony charge of solicitation, among others.

Montana Department of Corrections spokeswoman Sally Hilander said the plot was uncovered when someone Frank had approached about the plan informed local police.

Steven Rubenstein, a spokesman for Letterman's production company World Wide Pants, said he could not immediately comment or say whether Letterman or his family was in Montana at the time of Frank's arrest.

The host of CBS's Late Show taped three programs earlier this week but the network's coverage of the men's college basketball tournament pre-empted his Thursday and Friday shows.

Mike Ferriter of the Montana Department of Corrections said Frank had been working as a painter at Letterman's ranch west of Choteau in north-central Montana and apparently confided in an acquaintance earlier this month of his plan to kidnap Letterman's son and nanny for ransom.

The affidavit filed by Teton County Attorney Joe Coble said Frank told the acquaintance he knew Letterman and his family would be visiting their Montana home soon and Frank had a key to the house, knew where the baby slept and intended to kidnap the nanny "so that she could take care of the child."

The acquaintance contacted authorities Sunday, the affidavit said. Sheriff George Anderson told the Choteau Acantha weekly newspaper Frank was arrested the following morning at another area ranch where he was working. Anderson did not return phone calls seeking comment.

In addition to the solicitation charge, Frank also is charged with felony theft for allegedly overcharging Letterman for painting, and a misdemeanour charge of obstruction for lying to an investigator who first contacted him about the alleged plot.

He's jailed in neighbouring Pondera County on $600,000 bail. It was not immediately clear whether Frank had a lawyer. The Acantha said he did not have a lawyer present when he appeared in court Thursday.

Letterman's girlfriend, Regina Lasko, gave birth to their son Nov. 3, 2003. The boy, Letterman's first child, was named after the comedian's late father, Harry Joseph Letterman.

Letterman bought the Montana ranch along the edge of the rugged Rocky Mountain Front in 1999. In 2003, a black bear broke into Letterman's home twice, then was captured and relocated after returning a third time.

For years, Letterman was targeted by a stalker who called herself "Mrs. David Letterman" and broke into his Connecticut house at least seven times.

Margaret Ray eventually pleaded guilty to breaking and entering. Diagnosed with schizophrenia, she served 10 months in prison and 14 months in a mental institution. In 1998, she committed suicide at age 46 by kneeling in front of a train.
Comment from old pal Chuck:
(e-mailed to the author of this blog...)

''That woman actually KILLED herself?!? WOW man - I never knew that stuff happened; must be quite the guilt trip on Dave, eh?''

Maybe... maybe not, Chuck, old buddy... Dave can always rationalize that he had no responsibility there - wasn't his fault that the woman was schizophrenic and, for some reason, chose him as her objet de convoitise... In my humble opinion, he has less to blame himself for here, in comparison to Sarah McLachlan's handling of the poor sap who was ''obsessed'' with her... He never broke into her home - yet she would never even acknowledge him... and he committed suicide. Some fans though are excessive, absolutely - but handling them a little more sensibly would not be too hard I gather...
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