Forget About That "Secret" (and Invisible too, now) Corny Corner-Ribbon's Drivel! The Real Secret is HERE Indeed - not over there!

Monday, April 18, 2005

the more things change... part deux - the trivial version

...

Melina with the wrestler chosen to embody the old WCW Monday Nitro mythos: 
and in order to achieve that, they call him Johnny Nitro... 

1998- WCW and the then-WWF (now WWE, since the Panda kicked its corporate butt in court) were rivals - competing for TV ratings, pay-per-view buy shares and assorted merchandizing sources of revenue... Today, WCW no longer exists - but so many elements of it thrive on, in both the WWE as in the "all-new" NWA-TNA (which is, for all intents and purposes, a repackaged WCW - reborn!) that one could really say... hey, nothing has changed here! "Wooooo!" 
I was watching "TNA IMPACT" the other day (a show that could easily be mistaken for some entirely-different brand of "entertainment" right there... *lol*) and could not believe how much it resembled the WCW of old... all the way down to its supporting cast / mid-card cast of characters made up entirely of up-and-comers... and the tired old-timers in the main events! Gentle Giant Kevin Nash (boring) - NWA world champion Jeff Jarrett (technically-sound but boring - as ever) - "6-Pack" Sean Waltman (or "Syxx" - a skinny wimp who actually got roughed up by his GIRLFRIEND Joanie Laurer of former WWF/WWE/Playboy fame as "Chyna"... and I think his Tori also roughed him up too... boring in a sad, wimpy way...). And then there's even... DDP. Diamond Dallas Page, who rose to fame in WCW as, already back then, a too-old-to-wrestle "people's champion"... What can he be labeled as NOW... years later?!? Like 6-PACK there, DDP is wrestling to forget his lovelife woes - as he has been dumped recently by his once-beloved KIMBERLY. Her breaking of the diamond cutter's heart is reminiscent of yet another WCW case of matrimonial infamy - when dumb blonde Debra dumped Horseman Steve "Mongo" McMichael, who soon became so distraught over it he gained pound after pound and quit the Four Horsemen and wrestling all-together... Debra went on to work with the WWE, first with Jeff Jarrett & Owen Hart (who died shortly thereafter in a tragic if dumb accident - the bad karma of having a dumb blonde around, surely...) and then with Stone Cold Steve Austin, with whom she remarried. Austin though wasn't as understanding as Mongo - and he mustn't have been as impressed with the alleged stunner there because he gave her a patented "stunner" of his own. Actually, this did not take place in a staged bit of ring action but in real life... Yes. He hit her, allegedly strangled her for good measure, too, they divorced and she has not been seen since. Poor DEBRA... She wrecked Mongo's life - hers is in shambles too. What goes around, comes around... hmm? 
Others call it KARMA...
Kudos to DDP for not letting his Kimberly dear wreck his life like that; ironically, before returning to wrestling, DDP's main project was a reality-TV series with none other than... Stone Cold! They are buddies, you know... 6-PACK is another buddy too. Divorcé and notorious alcoholic Scott Hall is yet another old pal. Maybe they should all get together and form a new stable now - "the Lonely Broken Hearts Club". Mongo's not interested in joining though - I already know! 

TNA has recycled a number of WCW talent AND ideas alike - all the way down to archaic talent such as perennial favorite DUSTY RHODES (who looks like he is in his late seventies now...? I could be wrong... but he sure looks it!  *lol*). TNA has caged dancers even - in a near-strip club atmosphere...! Of course, the girls wear skimpy outfits all the time - and will never remove them. In comparison, WCW's NITRO GIRLS were truly classy prudes (especially that Whisper gal - she was tall and all but reserved in an exuberant kind of way - is that ambiguous enough for ya? *lol* Some people may wonder WHY; why did SHE have to wind up marrying the "Heartbreak Kid"...?!? Why couldn't it have been Teri Byrnes aka Fyre instead - the redhead of the group? Or... or... Chae, I think it was - the Asian gal of the group? Personally, of course, I marvel at the fact that ANY of them would consider marrying a guy from the "WWE" - especially him! Even the leggy one - Stacy Keibler, was it- she had higher standards than that!  (She dated Clooney, once!)  But who else was in there, again? Honestly, I forget who else comprised the "nitro girls" - called such because they danced choreographic numbers on a show called WCW MONDAY NITRO - on TNT, the network once owned by Ted Turner! There were at least 8 girls in all - and they were led by... Kimberly Page. That much I remember! But all that is history now - as in passé, yes...)

The pathetic thing about it all is that, even back in 1998, when WCW was number one, there were many who mistook it for Vince McMahon's product, WWF/WWE... Today, with many former WCW mainstays to be found in WWE (such as Ric Flair) that erroneous perception is likely reinforced...! And new competitor NWA-TNA, born out of the ashes of WCW, is likely perceived by those same casual fans / observers as some sort of farm-club for the big club, Titan(so-called)Sports' WWE...

Since the takeover, WWE has incorporated the Cruiserweight division into its sad, lame product. It also hired a long list of former WCW talents - at least temporarily. (No, it wasn't just Ric Flair! As a matter of fact, Flair was late getting there; the bulk of the talent crossed over within months. Many of them were already released -yes, FIRED-  before Flair agreed to come back!) 

And, now, the latest affront - the cherry on the sundae: they christen this guy "Johnny Nitro".

They say that the victor always gets to write the historical account of what transpired, afterwards... Well, here, it truly bites as the alleged victor was it only due to the fact that the owners of WCW pulled the rug right from underneath them - pushing the company out of their latest merger! The truth being that AOL/Time-Warner didn't want anything to do with pro-wrestling and they made it possible, themselves, for WCW to lose to WWE is a very, very well-known fact. If not for that, the execrable Vince McMahon would have never been able to "buy his competition" - especially not at such a dismal price! The rights to all things "WCW" plus the library and access to all the contracted wrestlers (those without guaranteed contracts, anyhow) for a measly sum that didn't even make good use of seven figures...?

It was WCW that should have won the Monday Night Wars, circa 1997 - put WWE out of business then! We would have seen all the alleged "superstars" of the WWE circus show up on NITRO then, one after the other...! There would have been no TNA... 
But that's not what happened, is it?

The Good Guys can never win. 
And, imagine that: not even when it is staged... 
WOOOOO...?

Comments:
Paul's two-cents worth (and it is all it's worth really - lol) from my inbox to here:

"Rasslin isn't real!!!!!!!!"

Are you for real, pal? *LOL*

Maybe Paul won't e-mail anymore after this...
 
"Anonymous" e-mailed me too...

"Poor DDP..."

Hey, at least he didn't get beat up by Kimberly, like "6-Pack" there did, courtesy of his erstwhile sweetie, Joanie chérie...!!!

"You forgot to mention the many former wwe stars in tna..."

Like what... has-been Billy Gunn... now "The Outlaw"? Or the alleged modern-day (and OTHER new age outlaw... lol) Jesse James or whatever HIS name is now... Please! I'd rather talk about WCW has-beens Konnan and Kid Kash... LOL

Kid Kash who, incidentally, always reminds me so much of the wimpy villain in such films as THE WARRIORS and DREAMSCAPE (a Dennis Quaid vehicle - please, Dennis The Menace to Celluloid - follow the advice once given to Kevin Costner by Andy Richter (who?) - STOP MAKING MOVIES!!! LOL).

Anyway - the scrawny villainous little guy in both of those films (the latter also had GREEN ACRES' own Eddie Albert as the President... and a still voluptuous Kate Capshaw...!) whose name I can't recall right now but who is a recognizable character-actor since the mid-1970's - he is sort of the prototype of our "Kid Kash" here... *lol*

Enough time wasted on this... lol
 
Wow - when it rains it pours - always...

I talk about the broken hearts of the squared circle (the wrestling ring - not boxing! lol) - and out comes the news of more adultery and backstabbing within the ranks of rasslin (wrestling -lol) superstars... ho-hum!

WARNING - THE FOLLOWING WAS NOT PENNED BY MOI - AND IS THUS NOT AS WELL-WORDED AS THE LUMINOUS BLOG TENDS TO BE - MOST DAYS... *LOL*

----------------------------


Breaking News: Edge's Wife breaks her silence
(NO - NOT U2's EDGE - WWE's EDGE - AKA ADAM COPELAND - hmm... isn't Copeland the last name of the lead singer of another band though...?!? More synchronicity I guess... it never stops... LOL)

Submitted by Phantom Lord on Tuesday, April 19, 2005 at 1:43 AM EST


(YES - the following was written by EDGE'S WIFE - AKA LISA... NO, NOT A SIMPSON - *lol*)




From TheMattHardy.com Message Board

WARNING!!! THIS IS A LOT LONGER THAN I INTENDED IT TO BE!!!
Forgive them Lord for they know not what they do.

"They" meaning all of us. The human race. We all sin, we all error. We all do things that need to be forgiven. As a Christian I have been struggling with this "situation" for months. As a human being (living in the flesh) I have wanted to retaliate and come forward and speak my mind a lot sooner.

I married a man, Adam Copeland, six months ago with the thoughts of "til death do us part." Obviously in our state of society that rarely exists anymore. The divorce rate is at 55% and no one bats an eyelash. When this story first broke I read so many things saying "People cheat, that's what they do" "Athletes, cheat that's what they do!" That my friends is a cop out. It is a way for all of us to look at ourselves and affirm our own actions in life. Whatever our own weaknesses are, we love to hear of others "failing". The old "I told you so"................. Throughout my adult life I have dated atheletes or somewhat "high profile" people, not because that was/is important but because those were/are the type of people I meet. I was modeling when I met my last boyfriend who is a pro baseball player and my best friend is married to a WWE wrestler. Big deal. I have been tagged as a gold digger, it's not that. It's the circle of people you are surrounded by. If not at the clubs, how does anyone meet their significant others? Through work, friends etc. What's the point to all of this???? Not much, just giving you all a little insight to who I am.

These last few months have been some of the most painful months I have ever experienced as a human being. I know we are all capable of hurting each other. Capable of things we never "intended" to do. Intended--- Amy and Matt where at our wedding. Amy was not welcomed there in my eyes because she was always a bitch to me and until now did not know why. But my thought was..."how do we invite Matt and Jeff and not Amy?" I will be the bigger person here and not stoop down to her level. I thought maybe as a woman she was "testing" me out after Alanah... wondering who this girl was in her friends life so soon. Does she want him for the right reasons, etc. I gave her that... little did I know this was all lurking around the corner. Adam and Amy... Amy and Adam... oh they feel in love... poor Matt, poor Lisa. I call bullshit. Adam and I never disrespected Alanah. I didn't want to have anything to do with Adam until his divorce was under way and I felt we were being honest and not hurting anyone. I always thought Adam was the Victim in that relationship, but now being on the other side of the fence..... not so sure anymore.

Did Adam and Amy make a mistake? Sure! Did Adam and Lisa move too fast into another marriage? Maybe we did.... Did Amy and Matt have problems? Not to my knowledge........... there are so many theory's, so many should haves, could haves, would haves......... but the real story is this--As a human being........ and I stress Human, how does one continue to do this?

Where their actions unforgivable? NO, but it's how they have both handled it after the fact. Adam blaming Matt for not being a stand up boyfriend and in turn having his girlfriend confide in him.... justifying how he could not only betray his wife but one of his best friends..... come on people you read his book.... him and Matt were best friends. When he had his neck surgery there were 5 people from the WWE that called Adam weekly to check on him--Matt being on of them. Matt was there so many times for Amy when she hurt herself. Whether it was the neck, the knee, or anything, he was there for her. How could Matt post his personal life on the net.... How immmature, right? Give me a break people.... If Matt wrote this all in his book............ No big deal! But because the WWE didn't make one red cent from this his personal life is "off limits". What was Unscripted all about. WWE's stars personal lives. As long as Vince can make a buck...who cares what the fans know. But instead Matt got fired b/c all the WWE is interested in now is Bimbos, another Diva search please. Personally I always liked Amy as a wrestler. As a person I always thought she was kinda a bitch and kinda looked like a man but I just chalked that up to all of the steriods she did... but hey maybe she's like Adam and only tried them once (Off the Record) and still doing them! Oh OK!

Whatever.

Amy and Adam have had many many opportunities to tell Matt and I both the truth. A chance to say hey... Sorry I hurt you but I fell in love with someone else. But they have both repeatedly continued to lie, lie, lie, lie! Why do they have backstage heat when suppposedly everyone else is cheating on their spouses? Because Adam is a coward and started naming names trying to bring others down with him. Amy was never respected by any of the girls b/c she treated them all as T-N-A and now that she needs them she is trying to gain sympathy. Well too bad, that is not how the world works. As women we don't trust each other as it is.......... as a woman disrespected by another ---Fuck you bitch! I had heard somewhere that she tried to call me to apologize but that was a lie... I have tried to call her numerous times with no luck unless I call her from Adams cell, only then does she answer. They are both cowards they are both liars and they both need major psychological help. Maybe one day they will get it.... maybe not. I know Matt and I will prevail. God doesn't bless those who have evil in their hearts. I am trying to forgive

Adam and Amy but it will take a while. Edge and Lita may be one thing, but take away Adam's steriods and what would he be? Another 6'4" skinny guy and take away Amy's oppenents like Gail Kim, Molly Holly, Victoria--Girls that know how to wrestle and guess what? That nasty bitch will bust her knee cap every other 7 months. Good riddance to them both. They deserve each other. Just remember what goes around comes around. I may not have handled this in the best way possible, but I never expected this to be my life right now so please forgive me........... God bless Matt and all the future has to offer him. And God bless Adam and Amy b/c they will need it when Karma comes knocking on their doors!

The Direct Quote

Matt Hardy Confirming The Statement


1) Yes. This is the former Mrs Copeland.

2) No, I'm not making this up.

3) You heard it here first on LOP, via WrestlingUnited.com

Go to WrestlingUnited.com, a part of the LOP Radio Network
 
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