Friday, June 03, 2005
Batman Botches Up The Job
Why even bother making another Batman film?!?
Why not a JLA film instead - you get your inept batty guy... you get your improbable ubermensch... but you also get five underused characters (as far as live-action film or television adaptations go) in Aquaman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Lantern and the Martian Manhunter... But that prospective film's budget might go through the roof (an Aquaman-type production, Waterworld* sure did... Imagine if it had had six more formidable characters to put up there, on-screen...) and that scares any self-respecting film producer s... ah, crapless!
However, that is no excuse to bother us with another overpublicized, overestimated and overemphasized (by some) "Bat-flick"... Really, what has Batman, as a character, done to be so "worthy"...? If anyone actually stopped to really think about it - Batman has got to be one of the most inept crime-fighters of all time! His alleged detective skills help not in the least his poorer-than-poor track record... for, if you take but one glance at his hometown, Gotham City, the allegorical darker-than-dark New York, the only logical conclusion to reach is that he is inept and inadequate at the task at hand... which is battling crime and stifling the ardor of all the Jokers around town (who are, admittedly, not so tough - come on!). He has most definitely not successfully ridden his "beloved" city of the criminal element in all his years of being at it - his city has got to be the one with the highest crime rate in the WORLD! As a super-hero, he has NO SUPER POWERS... he is no more, no less than a very bizarre James Bond (who, for some reason, dresses like a bat...) with plenty of gadgets to palliate to the fact that he has a lot of glaring weaknesses... And as for his detective skills... his success rate makes those as effective as Inspector Clouseau's - not Sherlock Holmes'! So - WHY IN BLUE BLAZES GIVE THIS BOZO ANOTHER SHOT AT A MOVIE FRANCHISE?!?
BatBozo Begins - in theaters very very soon...
Thank You sooo much for posting that! You made me burst out laughing when I was reading that! I needed a good laugh too!
BatBozo! HA HA HA!! If I could get on my PC and work in my Paint Shop Pro I would like to make batman have bozo hair!! hehehe.
DC fanboys - brace yourselves for more where that came from... and tell ye DC editing eggheads wannabees AND thy "fav'rit" creative types there too...!
Marvel Zombies - don't get too comfortable either...