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Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Merry Christmas!

I just cannot bypass the opportunity to bash certain scaly creatures... You know the types - attorneys, notaries, bankers, doctors, telemarketers, businessmen,
And, oh yeah - dragons/snakes/vipers and the like!
Hence the subject today...
It provoked my ire to learn that the Planetarium around here could not find better fare for Christmas time than a pathetic and quite nonsensically-titled children's "play" about a "celestial dragon"... Here, below, in italics, is the incriminating and revolting evidence (followed by a much better alternative to it... "Lumière" being the operative word, it simply has to be!)

Tandis qu'il joue avec son amie Grande Ourse, Draco, le dragon céleste, s'aperçoit qu'il a perdu son trésor! Ses recherches restant vaines, le roi Céphée et la reine Cassiopée lui suggèrent de demander aux jeunes spectateurs de l'aider à le retrouver. Commence alors une grande tournée des principales constellations qui les mènera jusqu'au ciel de l'hémisphère Sud. Draco retrouvera-t-il ce qu'il cherche. Pour les petits de 4 à 7 ans. Jusqu’au 8 janvier 2007

Saison de lumière
Depuis l'aube de l'humanité, des traditions et des fêtes célèbrent le retour de la lumière au cœur de l'hiver. Mais pourquoi des journées tantôt courtes, tantôt longues et de telles variations climatiques d'une saison à l'autre? Un spectacle tout indiqué pour les vacances de Noël! Tel. (514) 872-4530. Jusqu’au 7 janvier 2007.
Pour consulter l’horaire des spectacles, visitez le site du Planétarium.

Well then, the Planetarium eggheads and assorted dweebs, in their incessant craze bent on making their knowledge (or mere perception of the cosmos...) available to all, have gone too far in their attempts at creative presentations of said knowledge/perception...
It is all "harmless fun", surely, however it is still vehiculating such warped nonsense...
First off, there is no such thing as a "celestial" dragon - the one who used to be celestial and is now a dragon ceased to be celestial in any way the moment he grew scales, horns and claws. The cutesy-wootsy Draco crappy character is meant to make the 4-to-7 year-olds go on a tour of the known galaxies - however, the kids will not reatin half of the scientific stuff and will forever remember that damned Draco dud (until puberty hits them like a ten-wheeler truck careening down the highway of Life, that is...! But that is another story...)
The most annoying aspect of it all though is not the annoying horns on Draco's head or his goofy smile but really the dates during which this horrid spectacle will endure in... From December the 23rd to January the 8th! That's right - longer than the traditional Twelve Days of Christmas and longer than my own chosen 14 days of sardonic "Merry Christmas!" posts right here - on TLB Prime!
Quite frankly, it cannot get any more shocking than that as far as "revolting developments" go - as Ben Grimm would surely say...!
I pity the kid whose parents take him or her to see "Draco" in action... A good DVD of classic children's fare (such as *the original* Charlotte's Web, Crossed Swords, Babe and Benji - of course! But also such eclectic picks as The Plague Dogs and even Orca -though not technically "children's fare" per se- could teach the kiddies truly valuable lessons...) - now that would make a whole lot more sense...

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